I didn't post this on the blog, so just incase you missed it, here I am on Mamamia talking about men and what they REALLY want, or more to the point, if it really is that simple.
What do men look for in a partner?
It was an unfortunate coincidence that I had my furniture epiphany at roughly the same time that my husband sat down to watch the Rugby. We’d bought a new table and it just wasn’t in the right place, I needed to move a few things around.
As the words “Do you think you could give me a hand shifting this furniture…” made their way out of my mouth, I realized just how ridiculous the timing of my request was. With a look of disbelief my husband looked at the Rugby and looked back at me. He looked at the Rugby again and then said “unless you plan on moving the furniture while naked, you must know that you have no hope of getting my attention right now”.
I knew he was telling the truth, he really wanted to watch the Rugby and getting naked was the only thing that would have distracted him.
While doing my weekend scan of the newspapers I discovered this little article about what men really want from women. I don’t usually bother with these sorts of headlines (I read enough Cleo/Cosmo magazines in the 90′s) but I was interested that the information was compiled by a research company. It was going to be presented at the Australian Market and Social Research Conference in Sydney over the weekend.
Within the first paragraph of the story I was told the shocking news that men “are highly attracted to nice breasts and a cute backside”.
Who knew?!
The second point of the article was that it was possible that “they (men) have matured through political correctness and have been socialised not to say everything they think”.
Get out of town!
Were they telling me that for all of those years in my twenties, while I stood at bars and men told me I had pretty eyes and a lovely smile, it was possible they were just trying to get me in to bed?!
It was truly ground breaking research.
I am a 42 year old mother of 4. I have breastfed 4 babies and my exercise regime involves walking my children to their classrooms, pushing a shopping trolley through the supermarket a couple of times a week and very sporadic visits to the gym. In a nutshell, I am of average size (12 -14) with wobbly bits. My boobs have seen better days, my upper arms wave with me when I say goodbye and my thighs and I are no longer on speaking terms.
Having shared this with you, I can also honestly say, if I was to ring my husband right now and suggest he meet me in a hotel room near the office, he would possibly sprint down the stairs of his high rise, rather than wait for the elevator to get there. My wobbly bits don’t seem to bother him.
Thankfully, halfway through the article, I was to learn that men also valued traits such as togetherness, honesty, respect, a sense of humour and friendship (they’d just like you to have great boobs and a nice bum as well).
Really?
Having worked in the bar of a Football Club, I’ve heard some pretty atrocious comments made about women by men, but I also think it’s safe to say that most men when making a long term decision on love, aren’t just thinking about the DD’s. I did a quick survey on my male friends and asked how or why they chose their partner. Unsurprisingly, not one of them stated the number one reason as “she had a great set of jugs”.
When it comes to choosing a mate, I think we can give the blokes a bit more credit. We all know that most men (particularly heterosexual men) appreciate the female form, but when it comes to finding a long term mate, a mutual love of travel, an interest in home renovation and “she liked fishing as much as I did” were all reasons supplied by my male friends. And, yes I know, according to the research my mates are just saying that because they have been raised in a world of political correctness. I’d like to give them a bit more credit than that.
When it comes to my husband, whether I’ve been big, small, pregnant or in bed with a nasty head cold, the relationship has pretty much stayed the same. Some days we don’t like each other very much, but for the most part we’re best friends. And, even better friends when I’m naked.
Do we give men enough credit? Do you really think that men and women are looking for different things in their partners?
What a fabulous article, Kirsty. It sounds like our men have similar views on life, thankfully. J x
ReplyDeletePS Good for you, my friend - that's brilliant, guest posting for Mia.
Love it. I'm totally with you on the last paragraph. I have literally told my husband that "I don't like you right now. Let me sleep on this and get back to you in the morning". He knows I love him just not what he's doing or saying at that moment.
ReplyDeleteI would threaten so sue you for describing me to a T (except 2 kids not 4) but you've never met me before. I may think badly about myself sometimes, as I scarf down a cupcake for breakfast, but I know my hubby loves me, bat arms and all!!
You have to admit that you've meet men who are superficial enough to only care about the breasts and backside. I know I've meet a few. I think those are the ones they do these research reports with.
Loved this. I like to remember that 'superficial is as superficial does.' A good sense of humor serves you better in the long term that T&A, I'm just saying.
ReplyDeleteGreat article, love it!
ReplyDeleteAll men are attracted by the boobs and the backside. Just as all women are attracted by the brawn and the Alpha-behaviour. Nothing weird, controversial or new about that.
ReplyDeleteBest regards, Jens