We put our best clothes on, had the car valet parked, sat down at our "usual" table and caught up with the staff. We were on our best behaviour, G remarked on the flowers and how beautiful the hotel was looking. The maitre d' bought over gifts for the children and as we thanked him Little Traveler number 2 remembered something and said in an excited tone "Daddy, Daddy, Mummy told us what a Dick is today!"
As I locked eyes with the Maitre d' I let out a nervous giggle and he smiled and backed away from the table.
G has inherited his mothers hearing and said "told you what thick is?" and before I could jump in she said in a much clearer voice "NOOOOOOOOOO, SHE TOLD US WHAT A DICK IS". Good, now we had the attention of the table of Japanese businessmen as well!
It had been one of those conversations in the car on the way to school that had started so innocently. "What's a dick?" she'd asked. "Weeeeeeeell, I said, it's the short name for someone called Richard". "Oh", she said, so we should start calling everyone we know called Richard.....Dick?" Okay, so that wasn't going to work.
"It's also a word for your willy" I said. The car erupted in to cries of hysteria. In between fits of giggles the boys started saying "you've got a dick, that's your dick, where's your dick?" "Dick, Dick Dick" they sang. Little Traveler number 1 being the sophisticated 10 year old that she is, sat in the front seat slowly shaking her head, she looked at me wearily and said "Look what you've started".
Parents find themselves in all sorts of places having ridiculous conversations at all times of the day. Yesterday mine was a busy school car park, sitting in a car knowing I had minutes to get my children inside but answering burning questions like "well then, how do you be a dickface or a dickhead?"
After a couple of questions I'd identified what I was dealing with. A new vocabulary courtesy of the boy in Grade 6 who lives on the compound and was upset about a trampoline incident eg. he couldn't get on it! He'd let fly with some serious dick outrage. All I could think was thank god he's not in year 8, this conversation could be soooooooo different.
Our dinner table conversation is changing, the questions are different now, and we have to get ready to answer them. In the meantime, I had a look back at my blogs from our days last year in the hotel, the very first ones. Here's my little travelers when we arrived.